quarta-feira, 14 de janeiro de 2009

Chorona

Quem diria que, no final das contas, eu sou uma chorona. 


Ate mesmo quando nao ha lagrimas, em alguma parte dentro de mim,  eu choro. 

domingo, 11 de janeiro de 2009

Strength

I don't know when I lost it.
Maybe it was when I gave my heart away... Stupid choice.
Maybe it was when I thought it was best to not fight back something superior.
Maybe it was when I fell straight into a different situation.
Maybe....

And know I don't know where to look for it.

Self-destruction.

It has been sometimes that I've been having self-destructing thoughts.
At first they don't look scary, only appealing.
But suddenly, it becomes terrorizing, and I have no idea why it actually occured to me.

Maybe I'm lost.

I still know all about myself.
I still know what I think, why I want, but just don't know why I still do.
I still feel like self-destructing. Don't really have the guts to do it, but I think about it all the time.

It just doesn't matter that I know what and why, when I always care about the opinion of someone who thinks that what I feel doesn't matter.
I don't know how it can actually work out, but it is holding on.
I don't know what to hold on.

Self-destruction.

It is not sad. It is not terrible. It's just an alternative others do not approve of.
There's nothing wrong with it.
I don't know how life can sometimes be so fragile and sometimes so tough.
I don't know about mine, but I kinda wish it is fragile so when it ends, it can be quickly.

I'm really just a coward, after all.